WOOCS 2.1.5.4

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(Re)Uniting with Your Spouse on Money

Money is a major cause of bickering among couples. Over 7 in 10 couples say that money is the most difficult subject to talk about and 3 in 10 lie to their partner about their credit card spending, according to The Centre for Social Justice,  a UK based independent think tank.

I’m sure you understand why it is important for couples to agree on money issues, especially in the area of budgeting.

This area is clearly a weak link in many relationships. So understanding each others’ attitude and tendencies is key to strengthening your relationship and your financial future.

We know that opposites often attract, and in any marriage, one partner tends to be a ‘Nerd’, while the other is a ‘Free-spirit’ when it come to money issues.

Nerds enjoy planning and organizing their monthly budget. They need to know that the bills will be paid or they will worry sick.

Free-spirits don’t want to have anything to do with the numbers and tend to “forget” about a budget. They simply have faith everything is going to work out just fine without so much planning.

Nerds like the fact that budgeting gives them control, and they feel like they are taking care of their loved ones.

Free-spirits may feel controlled by having a budget or that their opinions don’t count.

These differences, when not well understood and managed often cause disagreements over money, which is a major cause of marriage breakdown.

To overcome this problem, both the Nerd and Free-Spirit need to be involved in creating and managing the family budget. Both of you need to sit down each month at the Budget Committee Meeting and agree what will happen to your money. The partner with the natural gift can prepare the budget, but the decision-making must be done by both of you. Each of you has a vote and you need to make it count.

The rule for the Nerd is this: Keep it simple and listen (Shut up for a change!)  And for the Free-Spirit, the rule is: Please come to the meeting and participate (Bring your brain!)

As you both agree in this area, you can turn this weak area of many relationships into one of your strongest points. As a couple, when you agree about your money, you agree about your future.

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